Translations:September 2001/Spank Menace Grows. No New Information./5/en

SPANK usage is thought to be rife amongst the young and is responsible for untold deaths and injuries. Common amongst SPANK users are serious mental delusions, including Vegetosis, when addicts who have gone too far believe they can never eat meat again and another condition with a long name that sounded very worrying. Authorities are convinced that SPANK distribution, although SPANK is a completely synthetic substance, is connected to Colombian drugs gangs who have long operated in the Liberty City area. They don't, however, have any evidence to support this supposition. Or at least, they weren't telling us, even when we bought them a lot of drinks, and threatened to show their wives photos of them leaving places of ill repute.